Countdown to Vacation

Only 8 hours to go before I begin my 10-day Florida vacation -- woo hoo! I am so thankful to be able to go on a trip like this -- although it won't be fancy or decadent, I don't take it for granted at all. I love spending time with my family, including my mother-in-law, which is a blessing all by itself. Not everyone can say that. We'll be staying with her most of the week, then going to my dad and stepmom's in Tampa for one night before heading back home.

Unless I find an amazing deal on a flight today, we'll be road-tripping it. I'm actually kind of excited about that... although our two toddlers may not appreciate it, I think it could be a fun bonding experience. Like those days when my parents used to take us camping because we couldn't afford any other type of vacation. Four kids packed in the back of a station wagon with a tent and several bags... maybe two sets of headphones between all of us... we had no choice but to get along for at least half the trip. We used to play these silly car games, like trying to spot license plates from as many states as possible, or I spy, or mad libs... Good times, at least in retrospect.

Anyway, I am really looking forward to some rest and relaxation. Rest is so important. I pride myself on my work ethic, but at times I can get overwhelmed and stressed out, which is a form of disobedience. Yahweh doesn't want us frazzled. We can't hear Him clearly that way. This year I'm making a new and concerted effort to be 100% obedient, so I need to hear Him.

One last thing on that note... I really believe I'm supposed to go 100% raw vegan at this point in my life. It's gotten to the point where my body goes into rebellion with the slightest deviation into cooked or otherwise unhealthy foods. New Orleans was a dietary disaster, which was largely not my fault, but nonetheless I'm fighting hard to overcome symptoms of sickness still today. Every morning I hear "eat only raw today," and it sounds a lot like the voice that says, "go to church" and "forgive that person" and "let her go first", so I know what I must do. Sigh... It's all good. He knows what's best.

The Power of Vision

Ok, it's official. I am definitely moving into a beautiful new house, at least 4BR/2Ba, which I will own mortgage-free this year. I will not need to renew my lease. Good-bye, Rockaways! As I type this, construction vehicles are preparing the ground just a few feet from my apartment building so that they can construct another apartment complex right next door over the next several months. I am quite sure that this will a) completely ruin my view of the ocean, and b) prevent us from ever sleeping in again while we live here. Which means, ladies and gentlemen, it's time for us to go!

I declare right now, as I gaze upon my lovely vision board with the Mediterranean and New American style houses surrounded by lush green yards and gardens, that I have my new home, right now, and that we will move into our new home before it's time to sign a new lease. We will have no mortgage, because the house will be fully paid for before we move in, this year. Can I get an amen, somebody? :-)

I am a child of Yahweh, the giver of every good and perfect gift, the creator and owner of every universe that exists, the One who makes rivers in the desert and parts seas, calms storms with a whisper and gives up His only begotten Son for a bunch of lousy, ungrateful sinners. Is anything too hard for Him? Is there anything He would withhold from me, His beloved daughter???

(The answer is no, for those who may be wondering.) I'm glad I'm going to be chronicling this whole journey in my blog this year -- it's going to be good!

It's good to be home

So New Orleans was interesting, to say the least. I felt a bit like I was on an emotional rollercoaster from a few days before I left until today... One reason was because I kept hearing this "little voice" try to tell me something horrible was going to happen during my trip and I wouldn't make it back home. I continually dismissed the voice and did my best to focus on what I was supposed to be learning and doing, but it was relentless. My flight home ended up getting delayed a few hours, so I didn't get back until almost 2 a.m. I didn't realize how much it was all weighing on me until I finally climbed into my own bed next to my husband, and proceeded to weep with relief for a good half hour. Sheesh.

We had relatives visit the next day, then church yesterday, and because I left my computer cord in my hotel room, I had to come into the office today rather than work from home... so it's been go, go, go all week/weekend.

Despite all that, I really enjoyed the conference and learned a lot. There are so many amazing tools out to communicate with people these days... but because there are so many, it means you have to be that much more excellent and strategic in your communications in order to stand out from the crowd -- something I always strive for anyway.

I was also moved by the present conditions of the city of New Orleans, partly from Katrina and partly from a long history of celebrating debauchery and lewdness. I felt so much compassion for the people, locals and tourists alike, who were so obviously suffering and choosing all the wrong ways to alleviate that suffering. I prayed over the city, and specifically the French Quarter, which I had a great aerial view of from my hotel room. I felt Yahweh's great love for the people, and His desire to see them set free. I felt His call to the churches in the area to step up to the plate and meet the needs of the hurting.

There's so much work to be done. It's almost overwhelming, except for the fact that I know we don't have to do it in our own strength. If anything, this trip really brought home to me the fact that there is no time to waste. Every minute counts. We must work hard 6 days a week and then we must rest, and repeat. We're not here to amuse ourselves. Pursuing fun and happiness will leave us disillusioned and empty. But laying down our lives and serving others will prove to be more fun and fulfilling than we could ever imagine.

Dream Team

The prayer calls we're having every day with my church are so powerful. I've only been on a handful of times so far and already I feel the momentum of the team and can't help but be inspired to continue to participate. Teamwork is so important, for everyone, but especially for the Body of Christ. My husband needed a team to get his album produced. I needed a team of creative women to help me rediscover my dreams and get clarity as we pursue our divine destiny together. As my pastor says, "We're all called to do something great, but none of us can do it alone."

I've played on sports teams for most of my life. I've always loved the dynamics of teamwork and the quest to become the best. Who doesn't like to win? The truth is that no one can win on their own. Even solo athletes and performers need a team to get them to victory -- coaches, trainers, mentors, nutritionists, competitors, role models, etc. I've decided that for the rest of my life, no matter where I go or what I do, I will be part of a team. And not just any team, a "dream team" -- consisting of like-minded individuals who know their roles and are committed to fulfilling them. A team that I can dream with, knowing they will support and participate in the dream, not scoff or try and get me to compromise and become mediocre.

I pray that the entire Body of Christ gets this revelation quickly. We need each other. There is no time or place for selfishness or laziness or contention. Arise, Church, arise!

Big Trip

I'm off to New Orleans (N'awlins) on Wednesday morning. I'm excited and, I have to admit, slightly apprehensive. This will be the first time I leave either of my children for more than 1 overnight (and I only did that once). I'll be gone 2 nights and 3 days. Yikes! I know hubby is more than capable, but I just hope the kids understand.

On the bright side, it should be a great IT conference, with lots of cool sessions about social networking, SEO, mFundraising, etc., and--the clincher--it will be over 70 degrees! I'm hoping the sessions I go to can apply to both my current job and forthcoming POC stuff. I love learning new stuff.

This is my year

That's what was prophesied specifically over my husband and me at church today, among other things. I believe it and receive it. The limits are off. We will seek Yahweh for the specific, practical steps we need to take each week, but the end has already been spoken and I'm celebrating now. Woooooooooooooooooooooo hoooooooooooooooooooooo!!!

Already breakthroughs are happening... radio stations throughout the country are playing a single from my hubby's album called, "The Devil is a Liar" -- how appropriate. He is one of the most influential rap artists of all time. I am one of the most influential writers and thought leaders of my day. All things are possible to us because we believe. This is our year!

Quickie

I need my rest tonight so this is going to be very brief... I just want to say how much I love my sisters in Yahweh. I have always had a great group of female friends surrounding me, so I have pretty high standards for my friendships, but the group of women I'm now in covenant relationship with is second to none. Yahweh has outdone Himself. :-)

Invigorated

Over the past couple weeks I have a new and deeper resolve to be obedient, no matter what. No excuses. The kids are screaming and grabbing at me with their insistent demands... so what? That's more expensive than I thought it would be... so what? I am proactive, not reactive.

As a result I'm getting more things "in the spirit" than usual. Dreams that I actually remember and that mean something... Visions. Today I had a vision which I was able to partially share on a prayer call this morning, then more was revealed to me later when the kids settled down a bit. ...This is cool! But more than that, it is essential. It is only the beginning. I hear the voice of Yahweh every day, as I should, and because I am prompt to do what He tells me to, I hear more and more interesting and important things every day. This is as it should be. And it will be. Praise Yahweh that He hasn't given up on me yet. :-)

The key word in my vision was Invigorated, and that's how I feel. I've been given new life, new power, new capacity, and there is nothing I can't accomplish in Yahshua and the connections He makes available to me. Yahweh is good and His mercy endures forever. Selah (forgive and be forgiven)!

Joyful Expectation...

...That pretty much describes the state I'm living in these days. I am so happy with my life and my family and how far I have come in the last decade. I am so grateful for Yahweh's constant guidance, even when I had no clue He was there or that He cared. So many things are coming into line. It's very similar to how I was feeling right before I met my husband-to-be. I was absolutely cherishing every one of my days as a single woman, knowing that at any moment I was about to meet my perfect mate, because I had prayed and was standing in faith. I used to dance to our wedding song in my living room, imagining how he would look and how we would feel... and sure enough, he emerged out of the woodwork in short order. :-)

This time the breakthroughs that I know are imminent are in the area of finances and in our callings and creative gifts. Every day another divine connection is made... and we're almost at the tipping point. Satan is sweating bullets because he knows he can't possibly hold back the immense deluge of blessings coming our way. Ha ha! Any day now... Yet I'm not feeling the least bit impatient because I absolutely know it's going to happen. I dare say I may even feel a slight bit of nostalgia for these days of "light affliction" when they're gone...

Nah! What am I thinking? As the Word says, don't waste time worrying about yesterday or tomorrow; each day has enough trouble of its own. I love living in the moment!

Piece a (raw chocolate) cake!

I continue to be amazed at how little food I'm eating and how little I'm tempted to have anything cooked, no matter how delicious I know it is. I have a major sweet tooth and I was in a 2-hour meeting yesterday with a huge batch of homemade chocolate chip cookies -- something I normally could not resist if my life depended on it, hehe -- they smelled great and everything, but I took one look, said no thanks, and actually paid attention throughout the whole meeting! Who says miracles don't happen today??

Seriously, though, I've noticed several "fringe benefits" this week as a result of going raw:
-- more energy (crucial)
-- fewer and less dramatic mood swings
-- clearer thinking; greater ability to concentrate
-- satisfied on much less food; rarely hungry
-- no cravings
-- I actually FORGOT to even think about coffee, which I'd been trying to give up unsuccessfully for ages.

Yesterday I had a banana for breakfast, another banana and water for snack, raw homemade vegan corn chowder for lunch (yum!), an Omega 3 bar right before I left work, a few bites of salad and 1 date for dinner.

I'm definitely planning to incorporate a lot more raw food in my diet permanently, if I don't go 100% raw. Very eye opening.

Day 5

My appetite continued to decrease yesterday -- not meaning that I didn't want to eat, but that I was satisfied with much less food.

breakfast -- mango, banana, spinach smoothie; and later green tea
snack -- Omega 3 bar
lunch -- green salad, handful of pistachios
dinner -- an apple and 2 dates

I even cooked bean burgers for my husband and kids, and for a split second thought about eating one, but didn't really want it... so amazing to me!

Today I feel a bit nauseous, but I'm not sure if it's a detox thing or if it's related to Scarlett puking half the night last night. She seems to have had the same thing Isaac had a week ago -- congestion for a few days, followed by a night of puking, a little diarrhea the next day, and then fine. Darn daycare! I realize it's so important that I continue to be conscious of their nutrition and make improvements whenever possible. If they were home all the time I'm sure they'd never be sick, but constantly being exposed to other kids who do get sick means their immune system has to work a little harder -- and therefore I have to work harder at feeding them the right things.

Day 4

I hate to say it, but this raw thing is almost anti-climactic. I'm really not struggling with it at all. I do feel more energy, but not a huge amount like I was hoping for. I'll see how the rest of the week goes before I decide anything, though.

Yesterday's food:
breakfast - banana, pineapple, spinach, water smoothie
snack - Omega 3 food bar, apple
lunch - a few pistachios, 5 celery stalks w/a little almond butter (wasn't hungry for anything else!)
dinner - big mixed green salad w/lots of veggies
dessert - 5 dates (I was going for a little energy surge right before vocal rehearsal at 7pm -- I sing for my church)

Last night I went to bed around 11 pm and woke up this morning at 5:20 am voluntarily, before my alarm (I did have to pee, though)! I'm a tad tired, but nowhere near my usual exhaustion under these circumstances. (I normally can't function without AT LEAST 8 hours of sleep, and then coffee.) Ok, so maybe the energy increase is more significant than I thought. I was just hoping to be running circles around my toddlers by now, but I'm not quite there yet. :-)

Day 3 Raw

So yesterday was much better in terms of my appetite. I didn't eat a ton but I felt satisfied. I'm not noticing any detox symptoms yet, which is encouraging. Here's what I ate yesterday:

breakfast - smoothie with strawberries, pineapple, banana, spinach, and water.
snack - Omega 3 food bar; blueberries
lunch - the 2 salads I had for dinner last night
snack - half a banana
dinner - raw spaghetti w/raw tomato basil sauce (the spaghetti is actually zucchini and yellow squash cut like spaghetti with a fancy veggie cutter my dad & stepmom got me a couple years ago). I made myself a huge plate but could only eat half.
evening snack - 4 dates, handful of pistachios

I also sipped on water throughout the day, but not a whole lot. My dad has been vegan for years and 100% raw for about a month and he actually told me he doesn't drink any water anymore. He gets all his water from his raw food, which is the purest source of water you can find these days.

So Far So Good

Yesterday was my first full day of eating all raw. It went pretty well. The only thing I didn't like was that I ate a lot more than my husband and was still kind of hungry after dinner, whereas he was fine. But maybe it was more psychological. I'm definitely more of an addictive personality than he is, and more of an emotional eater.

So, mainly for my own sake, I'll list what I ate throughout the day and see how it compares to the rest of the week.
breakfast -- water and a smoothie with banana, pineapple, and spinach
snack -- water, 100% raw Omega-3 food bar (almond butter, dates, raisins, agave nectar, quinoa, sesame seeds)
2nd snack -- 2 apples, water (didn't have time for actual lunch)
dinner -- handful of raw pistachios, 8oz. glass of carrot/celery/spinach/romaine juice. Green salad (spinach, romaine, tomatoes, celery, avocado, cucumber, carrots - no dressing), and broccoli & cauliflower salad w/red onion (tossed w/homemade dressing w/almond butter, lemon juice, water, garlic, sunflower seeds).

The hardest thing was not eating during the movie we watched after dinner. I managed to get by just drinking water and eating about 7 raisins - lol, but I so wanted to snack.

Today I feel good and notice a slight increase in energy (I didn't have to drag myself out of bed even though I went to sleep a little later than usual).

R.A.W.: Ready And Willing (surprisingly)

So today I went on a shopping spree for my week of eating raw (my husband is joining me -- brave man). I'm so blessed that I live near Trader Joe's, because I was able to find so much great stuff at a reasonable price. I'm actually totally excited for this! I'm even going to start tomorrow instead of Monday like I originally planned. For the past week or so I've been trying to listen to my body more attentively, rather than just assuming I know what it needs/wants, and I've discovered it really doesn't want as much food as I normally give it. It likes water, fruit, and greens mainly. Duh -- lol.

I predict one of two things will happen over the next week. Either I'll notice that I have a lot more energy and feel better overall before the week's up, or I'll start detoxing and feel like crap for a few days. If it's the latter, it will still be okay because it will let me know that I'm not eating as healthily as I think I am, and it will motivate me to continue for longer than just a week. But hopefully it'll be the former, and I'll still be motivated to continue.

Wow. Me, raw. Who'd a thunk it?? :-)